To have the abilities to almost be as powerful as God, but you're an existentialist.

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To be immune to every 37th bullet that hits you.

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The power to divide by 0

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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the power to be able to find you pointless super power post after its been posted to check on popularity

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the power to say candlejack and li

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The power to increase the loudness of a crying baby.

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The power to come up with useless power while you could be doing something literally ANYTHING else

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The power to return to life but only after being ritually buried 6ft underground

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The power to breathe underwater, only when your not underwater.

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A cat with human-like reflexes.

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the ability to laugh like george bush

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The power to lick your own elbow

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The ability to throw your hat up in the air and have it stay stuck up there in mid-air. We're gonna make it afterall.

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The ability to perfectly feign death for 10 days (no less), then wake up in a very small place.

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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the power to predict the past

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The power to laugh in the face of danger except for that time you walked face first into a glass door.

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The power to see through walls but only if they're clear glass walls.

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The power to have a blue, silhouetted body, and a trollface for a head.

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The ability to dissolve your own organs. They don't grow back, either.

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The power to cure cancer, but cause death by radiation poisoning.

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the ability to recite any nations alphbet BACKWARDS

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The ability to ejaculate at the most innapropriate times e.g. ur granmas funeral or your dads birthday

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!