The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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The power to make yourself numb and fall to the ground

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The power to read your own mind

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The power to choose a superpower from this site.

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The power to travel in time but only to the moment of your death.

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The power to take a crap.

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The power to breathe slightly faster

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The power to suck a golf ball through a garden hose

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The power to blow bubble with Tootsie Rolls.

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The power to be so perfectly blunt.

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Moral: THUMBS UPS SOLDIER!

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the power to have a dick in the box

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the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

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The power to jump over a sheep when you turn 10 years old

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The power to paint with all the colors of the wind!

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Actually, scratch that. . My pointless superpower would be having an ability to do something specific during a period when pretty much all others also have the capability to do that very same thing.

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the power to fart the alphebet

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The Power to die at will

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The ability to like this post

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The ability to know any language but only after learning it.

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The power to know everything, but then forget every 7 seconds

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The power to ejaculate at command

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The ability to lift things up and put them down.

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The power to read this text unless you can see it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!