The power to read this text unless you can see it.

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The power to poop standing up

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The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The ability to poop glue.

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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The power of intermittent hand seizures, at the most unfortunate of times.

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the power to be infinitely constipated

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The power to summon tastebuds in your asshole, but cannot be undone within 24 hours.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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the power to shoot fireballs only when your underwater

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The power to instantly kill anyone you start to love

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The Power to Power

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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The ability to put on a glove that is slightly too large and have your fingers grow to fit the glove.

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The power to jump as high 1/2 / 2 feet off the ground

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The power to fly in tornadoes

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

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The power to talk without a tongue

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The power to punch with the force of hulk ... But Die instintly

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The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!