The power to have a invisible boat mobile

The power to make Thursday come before Friday and after Wednesday.

The power to kill you self.

The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

The ability to breathe out of water.

Harnessing Homoeopathic wisdom.

The power to make money disappear.

The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

the power to stop sitting on the internet wacthing cat videos

The ability to teleport a maximum of two inches.

The power to eat McDonald's in Wendy's.

The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

The power to change the TV channel but only when the remote is in your hand

The Power to f*** her right in the p***y!!

the power to defecate while standing up...

The ability to see the future through the eyes of people you don't know in places you can never go while you are doing life threatening work.

The power to see the future five days after it has happend

The power to never be old but died at young age

ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

The ability to to die whenever you want. RIP

Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

The power to vote for the Presidential candidate of your choice, only to be overruled by the Florida Supreme Court.

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!