- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to be extremely well-endowed while having sex, but only when masturbating

The power to speak any language, but only the ones that aren't spoken in the country that you are in.

Liam Brudenell

The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

the ability to fly 5 centimeters above ground

the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

The power to never finish your sentences because

the superpower to turn into a chicken in a processing plant

The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

the power to get drunk you are needed

The power to be an ugly barnacle who is so ugly that everyone dies.

The ability to eat the red ones last

The power to breathe but only when your dead uncle breathes

The power to fly as long as your feet the ground

The power to obey gravity

The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

The power of attracting fired bullets

The power to time travel two seconds into the future.

The ability to jump 8 feet fences

The power of night-blindness.

the power to summon a pen, once

The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

The power to see 147 billion years into the future.

Pointless Super Powers