The power to create mysterious stains on your clothes.

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power to transform into a dick with legs

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The power to change place with any famous boxer everytime he gets hit. Moral: Hate me, love me... in the end you cannot hate what you do not care about do you? Remember this, when someone hates you, its simply because they care and worry about you... probably the only moral that makes sense... life is beautiful, thank you haters, thank you lovers, and you know what they say... haters gonna hate... they are all just a fluffy bunch of people that care too much :)

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The power of being able to see 1 day into the past

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The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

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The power to take perfectly timed photos when nothing interesting is going on.

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power of reading a book unless it has 3 or more pages.

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THE POWER TO SHOW HOW SERIOUS YOU ARE VIA CAPITALIZATION

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the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

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the power to walk an inch above land but only on labor day

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The power to laugh at other people when they get hurt, and still be able to have high esteem in front of all your friends.

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the power to eat out your but and poop out your mouth

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The power to turn on a hot flash, but only when it's 80 degrees out.

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.

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The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

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The ability to freeze-frame yourself. Forever.

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The power to turn cake into pie

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The power to turn your navel upside down

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The power to jerk off with no hands.

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The power to smell any point in time

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The ability to smell colors

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!