The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

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The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

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The power to control paprika with your mind

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The power to do a barrel roll without instruction

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the power to sit

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To tell how many kids in a sweatshop it took to make your nike's

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Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

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The power to grant underwater breathing to Mosquitos.

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The power to let someone control your dick

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The power to telekinetically pull sharp objects towards you at incredible speeds.

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The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

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The power to believe Jehova's witnesses.

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The power to drink any amount of water but get dehydrated in the next 5 seconds. :/

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the power to be able to foresee your death within a millisecond of it happening

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The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

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The power to give yourself cancer

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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(Only a girl power) the power to bleed every month for one day

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The Power to sit down only on chair made of knives.

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The ability to go to the time and place where you are going to die.

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The power to be invisible to the motion sensor cameras above automatic doors

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The power to gain an erection at will but only in front of your mother

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!