- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to inhale and exhale air

The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

The ability to pull open push only doors

The power to fly if you are eating.

The ability to spit mouthwash

The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

The power of always having small, thin clothes in the winter.

The power to become sick only to spread it to your enemy but you can't stop being sick until you have treatment.

The power to release the bogus

The power to transform into a bucket of water.

the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

The power to row 1 inch shorter but can't grow 1 inch taller

The power to give the wrong directions

the ability to shoot a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing

The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

the ability to turn into the body of a car. Just the body, no engine, no wheels, nothin, just the body

The power to be able to vote for Donald Trump

The power to lick your own balls!!!

The power to produce up to 20 gummy bears at once through the process of budding

The power to vomit every time you burp.

The power to waste time and sit around doing nothing and not helping society when you could be doing something productive

The ability to put on a glove that is slightly too large and have your fingers grow to fit the glove.

The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

The Power to sit down only on chair made of knives.

Pointless Super Powers