The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

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The power to transform every book, note or image on the television into illegal child porn simply by being near them.

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The power to die from darting too hard

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Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

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The power to make a woman be quiet but only during sex.

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The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

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The power to cry whole bananas grown in Brazil.

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The power drown in water

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the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

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the power to turn everything you touch into gold......deja vu?

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The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

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to be able to fly but only 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000001 millimetres of the ground and not even feel or look like your floating

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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the ability to stop time on your watch, wall clocks, and everything that runs on battery.

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the power to fire my lazer

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01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01101111 01110111 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01111001 01110000 01100101 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 00101110 (The power to type in binary)

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The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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the power to the power to sit on your computer all day and read all of these pointless super powers while eating or drinking soda

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The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

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The power to autocorrect your mom.

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The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!