- Pointless Super Powers

The power to strangle yourself to death

h owe to orge h irs n as ette of a or

The power to know what something looks like, bu only if you have seen it before

The power to drink poison and survive 6 hours longer than any other person

The power to make coma patients bark.

The power to have bought Wi-Fi, without any pc or cellphone to use it.

The power to shoot several liters of blood out of you`re nose at high speed at will.

The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

The capability to draw penises very well

The power to know who farted at any time.

the power to automatically turn into a litlle girl when you see pedobear.

The power to be white but only in the city limits of detroit or compton.

the power to sleep during day

The power to be an artistic genius during a math test.

The power to set yourself on fire but be immune to flames

The power to turn your fingers into penises.

The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

The power to turn into a slightly smaller, weaker version of yourself.

The power to commit suicide.

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

The ability to turn cement into pudding

The power to live forever, at the cost of your own life - Colleeto5

The power to turn water into wine.

captain obvious

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!