The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

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the power to teleport to the bottom of the ocean at will

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The power to stop bleeding 3-5 days a month.

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The power to give yourself cancer

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the power to see through tv's but only when your trying to watch one

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The power to be a normal human

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The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

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Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

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The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

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The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

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The ability to catch anything on fire, but only if it is already on fire

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The ability to go forward in time for 1 second but the process of going forward takes 1 second.

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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the ability to fall asleep in your bed and wake up In one of jigsaws rooms

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The ability to have X-Ray vision that only works on glass.

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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The power of not knowing the future

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the power of super intelligence to go to college and actually expect a job these days.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!