The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

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The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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the ability to fly under water unless your wet

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The power to live forever, at the cost of your own life - Colleeto5

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The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

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The power to simply walk into mordor.

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The power to have laser vision but it is 2 times worse on your eyes.

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the power die if you think.

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The power to get your blackberry to turn on slightly faster

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The power to smell WiFi Signals

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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The power to turn int water when your in water.

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The power to transport yourself back in time to when the universe began!

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The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

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the power to at will swap your hands and feet around... you fall over every time

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The power to teleport to any 3rd world country

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

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To be bulletproof unless you get shot by a gun

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The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

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The power to hear train whistles from 50 miles away.

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THE POWER TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!