The ability to DO A BARREL ROLL

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The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

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The power to breath underwater, but only after someone has recently peed in it

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The power to walk after gettin kicked in the nuts

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The power to hurt the people you love

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The power to be a human

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The power to fly whenever you get a stroke. (The power goes away as soon as the stroke ends, so make sure to get all your flying deeds done while you still have a stroke)

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The power to spontaneous combust on the third Wednesday of October.

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The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

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The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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Eht rewop ot epyt sdrawkcab dna kaeps ti yltneulf ekilnu eht yug ohw tog no eht tsrif egap.

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the power to disinfect wigs.

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The power to make your clothes invisible... only while in public.

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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the ability to fall asleep in your bed and wake up In one of jigsaws rooms

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The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

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The power to transform into a bucket of water.

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the power of super intelligence to go to college and actually expect a job these days.

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The power to give yourself Kidney stones.

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the power to any ugly person love you.

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Super Stength Backlash: Power of an incredibly powerful punch, but everytime you strike the force is reflected back onto you.

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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Hat seduction. 'Nuff said.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!