The ability to die instantly

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The power to strangle yourself to death

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The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

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The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

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The power to shrink your penis.

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The power to see where light is not present.

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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the power to make a vagina taste like pizza

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The power to be the best driver in the world, when not moving.

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Expert level knowledge of the Kardashian lore

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the power to die at will

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the power to see the things that are happening right

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the most bunka busting mega ultra super duper large biggest most powerfull cool best ever strongest mightiest power in whe whole universe but dont knowing what it is.

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the power to fly but only during a severe hail storm

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The power to sleep with your eyes open.

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

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The Power To Make Someone Cry A Single Tear, Once A Day,

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The power to turn Hydrogen Peroxide into water but only while you're using it to clean out your ears

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The power to come up with pointless superpowers on a website about pointless superpowers.

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The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!