The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

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The power to love me. Moral: I have enough of my own. HE TORTURES YOU BECAUSE HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE, I DONT TOUCH YOU BECAUSE I REQUIRE NOT YOUR LOVE, WHO IS YOUR GOD NOW! (still not me, Gods and super sayans are foolish)

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The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power to turn into a magikarp

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The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

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The power to see through walls, but only when you're in a glass room.

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The power to smell a fart from a 500 mile radius.

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The power to smash people's heads in with things.

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The power to travel in time for 2 seconds

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the ability bend your legs in a perfect circle

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The power to think your dreams are real.

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The power of slowing down your reflexes respond whenever you want.

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The ability to read children's books twice as fast as any given child.

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power to read minds, but only that of someone who is watching Twilight.

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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The power to die on the spot and not revive

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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the power to have an organsim when your a boy

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The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

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The ability to smell colors

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!