The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

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The power to know where the beef is

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The power to shrink your private parts.

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The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

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The power to see through glass

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The power to see through glass walls.

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the power to freeze people only when it's cold

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The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

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The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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The abilitie to tell whether or not the light on a fridge is on or off...

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!