The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

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The power to spontaneously break into song only during absolutely tragic moments.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

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The power to blink 1% faster than normal.

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The power to fly in tornadoes

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the power to inhale and exhale air

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The power to make bones of your body disappear and make them reappear in the wrong place

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The power to make your girlfriend orgasm only when you are having sex with another man.

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power to be the best theif ever known to man but only if your in the most high tech prison

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the ability to take an apple core out of the bin at will

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The power to read people's mind but can only read their minds when they are thinking about sex.

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The power to turn on your Xbox without touching it but you need your controller.

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ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

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The power to instantly pee when you see a person.

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The power to smell through your arse.

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

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The power to make an awesome school lunch for the kids!

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Being able to be invisible when no one is watching.

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The power to turn everything you touch into cheese

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Teh pewer off havin noo sentense speeled rite.

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The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to make somebody fall in love with anybody who isn't you.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!