The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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The super power to kill yourself at will

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The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

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The power to turn cake into pie

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The left part of your body is fireproof but the right side is not

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Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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The power to see at night but only black objects.

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The power to switch genders, but you can't switch back.

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The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

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The power to make money disappear.

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The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

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To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

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the ability to wake up on an elephant

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the power to produce shampoo out your eyes

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The power to remember anyone's birthday unless you are at their birthday party.

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The power to cum out of your finger tips

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th eability to have sex with anyone in the world but have to have sex with rosie o'donnell first

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the power to run windows ME for a day without the system hanging

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The power to transform into an ant, but only on busy pavements in the after work rush.

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The ability to troll a website like this. Basically, you do this. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM.

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The power to fall up.

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The power to use yo momma jokes in a masterful manner in all conversations.

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The ability to draw a perfect circle.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!