The power to make things disappear when I shut my eyes, then bring them back when I open them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

the ability to levitate

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The epic power of laser pointer vision.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

to zap people but only yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -17

the power to summon endless number of girls ages 6 to 13 but only if you 47 years old

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to be superman with no power's

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power to only have to go to the bathroom once a year but smell like poop the whole year.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to cook minute rice in 58 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power of attracting fired bullets

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power to hear everything in sign language and see everything in braille

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to spell-check or at least reread what you're about to post.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power to youtube poop

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to predict how an event could have played out, but only after the event has already happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Being able to poop your pants at will with no control over it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power to randomly die at any moment

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

To turn instantly water proof while eating a burito

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to fight your way out of a wet paper bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to be stupid reading this.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!