The power to incriminate yourself in a crime you didnt commit

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The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

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BULLET ATTRACTION.

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The power to fall apart whenever touched. See Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

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The abilty to jump 50m in the air without the abilty to survive long falls

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To turn i to a mosquito and can´t turn back

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the power to animate condiments

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The power to be special just like everyone else.

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The power to stick your head up your ass

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The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

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the power to get in the van

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the power to fart mace

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The power to be able to make something usable but have it disappear when you try to use it.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The ability to be heard in space

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the power to see through clothes in a gay bar.

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The ability to be telepathic but only while sleeping. So you just think it's a dream.

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to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

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The power to live forever but only in a coma.

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The power to forget everything u learned during a test.

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The power to cure cancer, in people already dead.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!