The power become a kite but not when it's windy

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The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

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The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

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The power to read this.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

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the power to watch youtube when there is no internet

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to only sit down and not stand up.

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The power of 12% levetation

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The power to die everytime you pee

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The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

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to be shitty

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The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

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The Power to fart glitter

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The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

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The power to become THE APOCALYPSE But you are NOT FIT TO SURVIVE....

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The power to instantly kill yourself

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The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

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The power to telepathically open umbrellas, only open and only umbrellas.

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The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!