The power to think of a useless superpower, but start typing and forg........ GOD DAMMIT!

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The power to turn on a hot flash, but only when it's 80 degrees out.

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The ability to see into the present.

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The power to think up something vaguely funny to put here to impress strangers on the internet.

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The power to fly, but only when pigs do

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The power to fly but only on a foggy Christmas night

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The power to bleed for 3-7 days for a week every month, and still live..

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The power to grow a mustache with your pubic hair

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The power to sign every comment - Some douche (Scott?)

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The power to become white by going into midtown harlem at night and shouting: I HATE NEGROES!!! At the top of your lungs.

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The ability to always wake up in time but never fall asleep in time.

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The power to be an ugly barnacle who is so ugly that everyone dies.

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the power to not fall in love with someone while you're dating someone else.

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The power to see into the present

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to give anyone an incurable disease

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The power to object to every point you try to... Moral: OBJECTION!

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The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

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The power to orgasm everytime you pee.

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The power to spontaneously combust while nobody is around!

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the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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Telekinetic power over styrofoam

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The power to turn into Justin beiber whenever you are about to have sex.

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the power to make people's spleen hurt for no reason

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!