The power to think this exact sentence at the worst possible time.

The power to fill up your HP, but only when it's full.

power to transform into a dick with legs

The power to a nokia phone.

the power to tie your shoelaces with one hand

The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

The ability to cross the Do Not Cross tape at crime scenes

The power to fly in tornadoes

The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

The power to be the only homosexual in a house of 5 other people who are there for sex.

The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

The power to pronounce the word "rural."

The ability to day nearly motionless while binge watching internet videos

The power to make police pull over the black guy next to you (in your car) and anytime this happens you get the ticket not him

the ability to know if a video game sucks just by looking at the name

The ability to rectify health and safety concerns, using a sword.

The power to write pointless superpowers

The power to sh*t bricks

The power of confusing the word "your" for "you're", or vice versa.

the power to say i can bend you

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!