The power to glow while under the sun

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The power to make money disappear.

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The power to know the answer of what is the purpose of life only after death.

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the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

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The ability to straighten pictures on a wall with your mind.

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The power to jerk off with no hands.

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the power to kill someone if you shoot them in the heart

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Delayed Reaction Man

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The power to smell whore

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The power to vote in a republican democracy.

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No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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The power to fart through your mouth and burb through your butt

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The power to jump 3% higher than the average human,

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Stop clapping

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the ability to become black.

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The power to have a unique fart smell

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The power to give anybody the finger - except the person you're mad at.

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The power to wipe your ass with one confetti

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The power to circumcise yourself

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The power to set yourself on fire but be immune to flames

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to zap people but only yourself

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

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The power to die when you use the letter e.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!