The power to know exactly when you are going to die, instantly! (died instantly)

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The power to jump 1 centimeter off the ground and be hungry and if you don't get food within a nano second you'll die of exposure to any form of matter

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The ability to float sideways very slowly

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The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

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the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

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The power o know why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch

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The power of 3 seond super strength,

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The power to run at 0.5mph

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The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

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the power to teleport to the center of the earth

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the power to make a pillow filled with feathers into a pillow filled with fluff

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The power to communicate with sperm.

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The power to exaggerate everything, a power a billion, trillion overly trabillion times more powerful than anything, like 3000000 Chuck Norrises, except they are all weak in comparison to this power.

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the power to be able to foresee your death within a millisecond of it happening

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Tha ability to not be able to fly

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The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

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The power to display emotions at will

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The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

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ability to swim superhuman fast, but only if you're completely naked and dry

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to wear the same clothes every day without them getting dirty.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!