To turn instantly water proof while eating a burito

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The power to die everytime you pee

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The power to laugh uncontrollably in funerals

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To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

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The power to make a Stegosaurus appear when you make a time-machine!

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The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

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The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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The power to only sit down and not stand up.

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the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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the power to become translucent

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The power of perfect 20/20 hindsight

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the power to poop dogs without fur.

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The power to whenever your punched you cry a lot of asid that burns your flesh

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The ability to get up early for school, but only on weekends.

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The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

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The power to turn into a lamp once.

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The power to be a woman

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You might not GET super power, but you can get some super bonus. Get free rides with Lyft, (only new passengers). Use Lyft official code "IAMLUCKY" to get $50 up to $200 in ride credits. Now thats like a little superpower, you get to teleport from one place to other for free with Lyft. Get some super bonus until you really ever get a super power ;-)

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the power to shoot what your looking at but only when your looking at watermelons

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The power to climb ladders faster.

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the power to stub your toe while gardening and only cry for twenty minutes.

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The power to become square shaped each time you are on fire. Moral: Try rolling on the ground now bitch...

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the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!