- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to eat a cheeseburger and still get fat from it

the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

The power to read all the other pointless superpowers

The power drown in water

the power to glow in the dark during the day.

The power to not constantly thumb my comments up or down, whichever. Moral: Energy spent on me, is energy well spent! Stay proud and walk tall soldier!

The power to increase or decrease the size of your bones, but only your bones, not your flesh.

The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times.

The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

The power to be super jewish

Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

The ability to talk to bacteria

The power to circumcise yourself

the power to turn retarted

the power to become translucent

The power to commit genocide, but only on things you love.

The power to wipe your ass with one confetti

The power to read terms and conditions

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

The power to be stupid reading this.

Pointless Super Powers