The power to turn back time and get the word "emit".

The power to do a barrel roll without instruction

The power to transform yourself into a door.

The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

the power to count from A to purple

hello

Immunity to curable diseases.

the power to find children extremely attractive

The power to control your own limb movement

The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

Basic telekinesis, limited to moving your body parts with your mind.

The power to increase or decrease the size of your bones, but only your bones, not your flesh.

The ability to read braile.

The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

The power to revive Hitler.

The power to do anything that will not affect anyone but you in any way.

The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

The power to believe you are being hilarious... get it? Eh? ;) ;) Ahahaha XD Yeah, thats funny eh? Yeah I know, how does he do that xD, I wish I knew hahaha HOHOHO! I should be a comedian!

The power to live,but only when you are dead

the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

The ability to sit down without using any other body part than your butt.

The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

the power not eat more than one pringel.

The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!