The power to kill you self.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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The Power to Breath When Ur dead

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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The Power to Die instantly.

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The power to sleep through a dream.

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The power to have sex and sleep at the same time

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the ability to take a fart that other people can actually see.

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The power to go forward through time to a second from now. I wonder if I still be in this world then when I use that power though.

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The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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The power that turns farts into music.

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The power to unwillingly turn into a girl when you have sex with your girlfriend or turn into a guy when you have sex with your boyfriend.

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the power to make broccoli taste like asparagus

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The power of reading your own mind.

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The power to resist Buzz Lightyear´s lazer beam, but only in real life

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The ability to break & unbreak every bone in your body at will

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the power to itch your teeth

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the power to shoot knifes from ur pen*s hole.(ouch)

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The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

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The power to be white but only in the city limits of detroit or compton.

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The power to draw a perfect circle.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!