The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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The power to own Greek, Italian and Irish stocks.

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The Power to fart extremely loudly every time your in a crowd.

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The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

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the power to know when the pope is taking a dump

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The power to make an awesome school lunch for the kids!

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the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

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The power to blow up when you blink

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Invincibility, but you feel twice as much pain to everything

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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a power to turn liquid into goo!

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The power to erase your own existence.

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The power to throw up and have it go back into your mouth

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The Power to make PotNoodle...

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The power to lick anything except pussy.

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Aweonao

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the power to run in slow motion

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The power to sing with your buttcheeks

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The super power to control paper.

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The ability to sense a crime has been committed, but only after the criminal has already been caught and safely locked away in jail.

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The ability to change races.

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The Power to Die instantly.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!