The power to mentally unlock any lock you can see, but only if the key is within 10 feet of where you are.

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The power to excel at something that nobody cares about.

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The power to science.

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The ability to sh*t actual bricks.

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The power to heal yourself when your not hurt

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to grow your fingernails .0001 centimeters a day

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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The power to jump faster.

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The power to kill yourself if there is a bullet in your heart, brain, and liver all at the same time

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The ability to hear fish.

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The power to become erect at the sight of a man's butthole, oh wait thats just liam flanagan

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

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The power to defeat any ant you may encounter.

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the power to die 10 minutes after reading this comment

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The power to make yourself deaf.

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The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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The power to kill someone as long as they've already been killed.

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The power to write a country song

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The power to never be hungry for five minutes after you eat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!