The power to chew on chicken heads without breaking your teeth.

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The power to burn the sun.

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The power to generate lottery numbers which don't win

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North Korea's Nuclear missile program.

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the power to make realy convincing whale noises

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The power to waste time and sit around doing nothing and not helping society when you could be doing something productive

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The ability to never have to take a shit again

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The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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The power to jump inside the TV, but only when the screen is removed

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The power to when you get scared, you fart.

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The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

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The power to fight fire with fire and create more fire.

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The power to have your veins be a 1% lighter shade of blue.

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The power to revive Hitler.

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The power to piss out of your ass and shit through your dick

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The power to commit genocide, but only on things you love.

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the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

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The power drown in water

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The power to not be funny

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to go hibernate at winter.

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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The power to use very big words but only when your at a retarted people convention

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The power to break through walls but forget to shout "OH YEAH!"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!