Eat pizza but you have to be eating pizza

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The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

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cry acid tears

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The power to smell any mans underwear without getting caught... (works only on straight men)

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the power to be a master carpenter, make anything, except love.

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The power to sh*t bricks

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the power to have an organsim when your a boy

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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The power to fly but only when your eyes are closed.

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the power to be Justin bieber

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X ray vision on chairs

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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The power to live through torture.

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The power to speed up time for only 1 Planck Instant every hour.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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The ability to make any amount of money appear in your wallet. The money is in the form of the Neptunarian Dollar, which has no value anywhere on Earth.

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The ability to have ALL the powers... But you have to have them activated by people you fight. Only the people you fight....

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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the power to hear a dog whistle

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The power to tell when someone is using a cheese grater within 5 feet

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The power to create peanut butter and jelly sandwiches without having any peanut butter.

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The power to sneeze with your eyes opened.

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The power to speak only one language

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The power to blink, but only if polline gets in your eye.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!