the power to say the power to say the power to say the power to say.....

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

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The power to see 1 plank length farther then most normal people

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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The power to compare anything to porn because "you know it when you see it."

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the ability to produce petrol from your ankles but only when you're on fire.

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The power to fly, but only 1 millimeter above the ground, while moving at a speed slower than a snail.

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The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

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The ability to become a paraplegic at will.

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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The power to turn on electronic devices without pressing the switch, but only when you're touching the switch.

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The ability to de-carbonate soda

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The super power to control paper.

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the power to fart in 7 different colors

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power to look pretty but only in your mom's eyes

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The ability to change races.

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blindness

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The power to slightly accelerate the growth speed of your left toenails.

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the power to hear any alvin and the chipmunks song you want, but only when you have a migraine

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The power to snore inhumanly loud

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The power to change your emotions at will.

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The superpower to read minds only if they think about nothing

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Being able to see exactly 0.001419 seconds into the future

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!