The power to have Pauly D haircut while being a dumbass.

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The power to make bananas appear, at the sight of a cobweb..

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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The ablility to think of the worst racial slurs, but only when a member of that race is nearby.

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Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.

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the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

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the power to complete math exercises

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The power to wake up to surprise sex in the morning... in prision.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to vote for Hillary Clinton and be happy with the decision that you made.

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the power to turn into a fish that is less then one mm small while only on land

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The power to be writing a pointless superpower on a website about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive.

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the power to like charlie

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The power to wear the same clothes every day without them getting dirty.

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The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

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The power to increase the amount of earwax by 300 percent at will.

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The power to imagine boobs whenever you want at any time

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The power to make terrible puns and drink ketchup non-stop, otherwise known as being Sans.

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

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The ppwer to say SHAZAM, Then someone says wat?

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The power to urinate in mouth.

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The power to never need to eat, unless you are hungry.

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The ability to shrink the size of your third toe on your right foot every leap year.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!