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Writing "because moral man loves you" Moral: I am far too antisocial to love everyone, I mean the more love for me the better... so I can give a lot to my girlfriend too... love you baby! (my girlfriend duh) Moral 2: Someday ill tell her that I type this comments, and if you thumb this up, she will find out I declared my love here too... aww... love the man that does not love you... for love! Me: Huh? My head is spinning... and if yours is too, then thumb this comment up.
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+74
The ability to breath in a complete vacuum but nowhere else
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+70
The power to see 1 plank length farther then most normal people
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+66
The power to have everyone in the universe believe you are dead. Including you.
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+50
the power to become retarded
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+48
The power to use you`re veins as a lasso.
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+38
The power to fall from any height and stop in midair right before you hit the ground, then continue falling with 100x the velocity from before you stopped.
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+32
the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.
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+28
The power to know what card is on top of a deck, but only when it's an 8 of diamonds.
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+20
the power to delete your own existence from the univers( aka you never existed in the first place and neither did the power )
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+20
The power to understand the farmer in Hot Fuzz.
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+14
The power to have sex with someone but only in your mind
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-8
Everything Hawkeye does
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-12
the power to absorb gamma radiation, but no resistance to radiation poisoning.
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-16
The power to speed up time for only 1 Planck Instant every hour.
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-18
Hearing so good a raindrop will deafen you
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-20
The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster
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-22
To be bulletproof unless you get shot by a gun
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-22
The abilty to jump 50m in the air without the abilty to survive long falls
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-24
the power to produce shampoo out your eyes
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-24
The power to be a Fox News anchor with something actually coherent to say.
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+151
The superpower to speak from to anybody's asshole.
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+143
The power to talk like Batman perfectly, but only at really serious moments.
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+141
The power to grow your toenails, but only one at a time.
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+139
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!