the ability to duct tape an alarm clock to the side of your head

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The power to have explosive diarrhea involuntarily but only on dinners with your date and his/her parents.

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the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

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The power to resurrect the dead but only for 1 second.

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The power to eat sandwiches and never get full

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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the power to do two suicide bombings

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The ability to teleport instantly to your current location.

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The power to transform into a green extremely skinny and weak guy when you get angry.

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The power to say IS every time in the same over the top dramatic way

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The power to speak in languages that no one around you understands.

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The abilty to go through water.

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The power to sing "Friday" by Rebecca Black, but only on Wednesday.

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To point out that the superpower below was the power to type partially invisible sentences. Moral: I did not realize that most of you would find that too hard to understand, but thumb me up if you did... And thumb me up if you did not... (watches comment disappear in the minus 10000 comments section) Damn flashes of the future... Heck! Just thumb it up if you like it because you liked it... and leave it be if you do not... or else I will use my most evil superpower in the world: Ignorance... aka I will ignore it.

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The power to find any object in an I-Spy book, but instantly forget the location of the previously found object.

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The power to shrink, but only for roller coaster rides

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I am derpin the erp to derp the derp the erp o o o o yeah derp frika frika frika derp derp derp

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The power to sense the emotions of inanimate objects.

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The power to count to infinity.

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The power to understand that if you type or read at this section, then it is probably because it means something to you... Moral: That is almost a superpower... I mean wow pointless makes a point which is pointless, and a pointless point with a point is... anyway I just divided by infinite loop. Cant say that is far away from zero which by itself is basically a circle... Damn im good! (just for that final line im gonna get thumbed down, its worth it though.

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The power to have a power

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the power to fax people with your mind

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the ability to make toast while standing on your head at 12:46 every Tuesday Greenwich Meridian Time.

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The power to never run out of toilet paper when going to the bathroom

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!