The power to always know the exact time.

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The power to shoot blank bullet rounds out of your fingertips.

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the power to smack the hair off someones head.

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The power to grow giant, sharp and needly painful dildoes out of any surface just by sitting on it.

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Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

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the power to fly indoors

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The power to instantly waste all your money on cheap mango chutney at will.

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X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

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the power to kill someone if you shoot them in the heart

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The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

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the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

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The power to turn everything you touch in to a plastic fork.

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The power to end a sentence the way that people wasn't expecting them to orangoutang.

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The power to..em............ Forget your super power.

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The ability to drop everything you hold

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to be fat only when your at a party.

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The power to control every extinct species but to be unable to revive them

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Apathy for the world. (Don't stop believing.)

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The ability to fly a millimeter off the ground.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The ability to grow and retract your hair at will, but cutting it will remove the ability.

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The power to not be turned off by the word "moist"

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The power to pee after drinking lots of water

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!