The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

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the ability to teleport far away from here but still be stuck

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The ability to walk on walls as long as you're laying sideways on the floor.

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The power to fap without satisfaction

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The ability to pass out at will.

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The power to always have the exact amount of money in your pocket when buying something, but then drop and lose a dime when the money over.

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The power to slap the thigh and ride the wave :P

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the power to live a happy and fullfilling life...

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the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

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the power to do one push-up

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the power to finally find your way out of a revolving door.

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the abilty to come back to life, but in a black hole.

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to talk in a mexican accent whenever you want to say "Whats up Essay"

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Being Aquaman

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the ability to taste so good it makes you wanna slap yo mama

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The ability to not freak out when your mom calls you

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The power to bleed anally at will

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The ability to cure someone of HIV, but you contract it yourself.

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The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

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The power to have YMCA or "In the navy" play explosively loudly from your nostrils and be immune to it yourself. Moral: WE KNOW YOU ARE H0MOSEXUAL ALREADY! TURN THAT SHIT OFF!

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The power to shoot blank bullet rounds out of your fingertips.

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The power to make anything taste slightly more like spit.

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the power to pee standing up when your a woman

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The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!