The Pickle Touch- That is, the power to pickle any object by merely touching it.

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The power to be a walrus

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The power to be Obama when he's not president anymore

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The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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the power two peel m&ms -jesse

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The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

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The power to know every language except for ones spoken in the country your in.

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The power to start time.

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The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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The power to have no powers!

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The power to drink an entire bottle of soy suase without dieing

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Power to see through walls, but it only works with glass.

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The useless power to write about useless powers...

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the power to not have a power

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The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

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The power to eat food

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The power to buy free things.

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The power not to dance while you're in a coma.

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The power to make any liquid luke warm (it works both ways)

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the ability to uncontrollably fall out of planes

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The power to agree to the "Terms of Service" without actually reading them.

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!