The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

The power to bleed

The power to destroy the earth the next time you blink.

The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

the power to spell words wrong

The power to be a woman

The power to solve any problem with another problem e.g. Putting out a house fire with a flash flood.

Smell chick peas from over two miles away

The power to hear everything. But only def people have it.

the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

Feeling people's depression.

The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

being black

the power not eat more than one pringel.

The power to become a fish for 10 hours on dry land

The power to remember a song's name, but you forget when you want to search, write down, or talk about it.

The ability to produce water but only when under water.

The power to count to infinity.

the ability to fart out of your nose

The power to be Chuck Norris. Oh wait..

The power to turn into a toothpick. Once. And you can't go back.

The power to freeze time, but not unfreeze it.

Hetsy overpay otay peaksay igpay atinlay

The power to ride a camel when slapping a donkeys butt cheeks

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!