Your mom is so ugly, she was mercilessly bullied through high school and had severe depression and self-esteem issues. The power to post anti-jokes only on pointless superpowers.

The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

The ability of using their one true super power with stunning accuracy.

The power to make grey spots appear on the wall, but only when u are peeing

The power to see through things like locked cabinets, wrapped birthday presents etc. But only if you know whats inside.

The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

To control electronical devices, only while holding it's remote.

The power to fart in technicolor.

power to eat through your but

The power to teleport anywhere at the cost of your life.

the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

The power to obtain achieve errection when your not arroused, but go flacid when you are arroused.

-The ability to turn friction on and off.

The power to see thru windows and turn door knobs.

the power to shrink or grow at will, except your organs stay the same size

The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

The Power to make up full names on the spot.

The power to dace uncontrolably but not be able to stop...ever

The power to turn into shit, but not be able to change back.

the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

The power to fly, but only when on the ground

The power to ejaculate lazer beams...

The power to drink an entire bottle of soy suase without dieing

A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!