The power to give your wife rights

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The power to have a black president

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The power to turn your head 360 degrees

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The power to feel pain when ever you want

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The power to drink poison and survive 6 hours longer than any other person

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The Power To Grow Potatoes from your hair

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The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

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The power to hear a person's thoughts, but only when they're on the toilet.

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The power to travel faster then the speed of smell

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The power to give super powers to others, but only to people you don't like.

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The power to travel back in time! But only 10 seconds. But only every 10 seconds. And you have to do the exact same thing or the universe will explode.

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the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk

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The power to beat any video game after you've beaten it

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Hitler Superpowers. The ability to kill 3 million Jews.

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The power to have any power you want but only when it's completely useless to have it.

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The power to have a power

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The Power to be more useless then the most useless object in the world.

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The Ability to read another's mind, After insightfully asking them what they are thinking.

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the distinct ability to tell when a marine plant is mildly displeased with it's cells.

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you have the power to se anything and everything in the entire universe, but only if you are blind.

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The ability to have 20/20 vision... only when wearing glasses.

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The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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the power to not have a power

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!