The ability to fly, but only while you're touching the ground.

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The power to have an indestructible tongue.

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The power to shrink at will, but never grow back to your normal size.

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Strength to instantly kill anyone just by lightly tapping them, as long as they're physically stronger than you.

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The power to see through windows

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The ability to see everything in black and white.

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Everything you touch turns into piles of steaming shit.

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The ability to perpetually masturbate.

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the power to spawn goosebumps when ever you want

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The power to smell your own feet without taking your shoes out.

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The power to get the most thumbs up`s on you`re comment.

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The power to fall asleep before the end of a movie

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to breath fire even though you are not fireproof.

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The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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the power to win the crying game

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The ability to creat the worlds best computer but only if it doesnt work

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the ability to fold towels only while they are dirty.

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The ability to hear a tree falling in the woods when there is nobody there to hear it.

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The power of destroying anything that's inert with one punch, but dying afterwards.

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The power to write stupid and unintelligent messages that have no purpose or aim whatsoever.

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The power to blink one second faster then usual.

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The power to always lie even when you don't want to and then you have to truthfully say that you were lying otherwise the closest person kicks you in the groins.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!