the ability to turn a banana into an apple at will, but only for a few seconds.

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Autokinesis (the ability to move your own body).

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The power to go suicide

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The power to be attracted by bullets

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

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The power to run at the speed of a human

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

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The ability to not come back to life when you die.

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the power to win any shit eating contest.

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the ability to know if a movie is bad or good but only after you have watched it

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The power to be 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds younger

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Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

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The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

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the power to go into a coma

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the other is a baby.

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The power to do something when you do it.

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The ability to propel yourself and others away from you by sneezing.

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The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

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The ability to explode upon contact with glass.

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The power to summon earthworms

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The power to turn anything you touch into cats

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The power to grow your nails longer

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!