The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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the power to be the best looking person but only to rapists.

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The power to eat toilet paper and crap self-wiping poop. Think about it...

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The ability to poop glue.

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The power to party like it is 1999 despite it being 2011

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qtiopihvk

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The power to push any muffin button, but u get no muffins

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The power to shit bombs that only go off when bitten by you.

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The power to kill someone with a knife

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The power to create mysterious stains on your clothes.

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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The power to volunteer as tribute.

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The ability to fly but only when you touch the ground.

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the ability to fold towels only while they are dirty.

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The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

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The ability to see every color in the world but only when your eyes are closed.

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The power to have tastebuds inside your ass.

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The power to give vegetables immortality.

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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The power to take offence to anything said or done like it matters...

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The power to eat gumbo with a fork.

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The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

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The power to read View Terms of Services

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The power to resurrect dead insects

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!