the ability to grow your nails at will.

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The pewer to kill elderly people by sneaking up behind them and yelling: MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAT!

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The power of women's rights.

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The ability to fly but only for 5 seconds and when you are on an oily floor in tube socks being chased by 10 Puerto Rican woman.

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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The power to run 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% slower.

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The power to be the best driver in the world, when not moving.

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The power to produce fish eggs from your left eye

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Being only half invisible.

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the power to see through windows

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The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The power to point at anything you want as long as you can see it.

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The power to manage Chelsea FC

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The power to see what's behind you.

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The power to only sit down and not stand up.

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the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

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The power to become square shaped each time you are on fire. Moral: Try rolling on the ground now bitch...

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The power to urinate in any color- even rainbow color!

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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the power to commit crime.

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Everything you touch turns into piles of steaming shit.

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The power to shit whole balogna sandwiches.

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The power to swim very fast in shallow water.

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The power of having night vision that only works during the day

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!