The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to count the number of hair on your head.... Backwards!

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The power to turn into any edible object in a restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to be indecisive about which seat you can take.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

the power to teleport to the bottom of the ocean at will

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The power to throw a Boomerang and it always hit your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to create shit

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The power to always have the worst thing possible happen

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to pause time and control every person you touch while the time is paused

thumb_up thumb_down +65

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

thumb_up thumb_down +95

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

constantly flowing sexy anime hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The Power to make PotNoodle...

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The ability not to be able to make a bong out of a taco bell cup

thumb_up thumb_down +104

The power to type any password only if some one tells you the password first.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to produce infinite cat flavored toast made from poop out of your mouth, only while in public with 100 people that would stare at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +104

The power to shrink your dick smaller but an inability to make it larger (even back to the original size).

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to see what's behind you.

thumb_up thumb_down +104

The power to fart slightly less deadly

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to inflict the most agonizing pain to yourself. Can only be used once and it doesn't go away

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!