The power to not move or do anything.... at all

The power to look into cheese.

The power to hold your breath while unconscious.

The ability to fly as long as you're touching the floor.

The power to read people's mind but can only read their minds when they are thinking about sex.

The Power of being Friendzoned

The power to poke

Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

The power to feel like your starving and everything tastes like crap.

beeing the dragonborn, when there are no dragons....

The ability to find any lost pennies, as long as you're Jewish

The power to get hungry when looking at exotic animals.

The power to turn swans into pigeons (but not pigeons into swans)

The power to emit a password protected wi-fi signal, but only while you sleep.

The power to triple-click in the time it takes a regular human to double-click.

The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

The power that when you think of someone's face your nostrils are filled with the smell of their feet

The power to shoot poop balls when you masterbate.

The power to have a small penis

The power to ride a bike

The power to understand irony.

The power to have all your friends leave you

The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!