- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to see moving objects farther than they actually are.

The power to think salmon.

The power to travel a hour back in time by focusing really hard on it for two hours. Moral: Automorals roll out!

The ability to telepathically talk to people, but its sent in Morse code in dog whistle so human's can't hear it

The power to have children at will.

The power to see events happen 0.04 seconds AFTER they occur

the ability to shit active helicopters >o

The power to suck your own dick

The power to transform into anything you have already become

The power to read the mind of anyone who is having the exact same thought as you.

The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

the power to be a wi-fi hot spot

The ability to lactate air.

The power to transform into yourself

The power to fill in ___ blank

the ability to walk half through a brick wall

The power to kick ass when your names aoife.

the power to shit with your mouth

the power to die at will

The ability to teleport from any toilet to any toilet and read minds of anyone in the bathroom all around the world.

The power to convert any Catholic priest into a pedophile.

The ability to feel all pain 30 seconds after it happens.

The ability to turn everything to gold; as long as the original material is gold.

The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

Pointless Super Powers